Life is hard. Henry David Thoreau stated in his classic work, “Walden” that ““The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation”. To my knowledge and in my experience, there is no way to get around pain. Pain is cleansing and pure. It communicates like no other sensation. It requires immediate attention and will bring you into the present faster than anything. Pain reminds us that we are dynamic and alive. Constantly changing and in movement to achieve balance (homeostasis for those who prefer the scientific term).
Pain is a gift that life bestows on us, but suffering is the package we wrap it in. Suffering is what we put on top and around our pain. If someone emotionally close to me dies, I am going to feel pain. If I hold on to anger and resentment for something that person did to me, I am adding suffering to my pain. This is how we trap our pain and become emotional sufferers.
This blog is about how most of us add suffering to our natural pain and addresses some ways to not only be aware of how we do this, but a way to allow pain to move through and return to a place of balance. No need to add suffering to the process. No additives needed. I encourage you to find a way to better day simply by how you think. How you think, not what you think, is a critical piece to managing emotions.
The next discussion will focus on how we all need to be smarter than our brain. A critical change in HOW we think about ourself. Just briefly, I often tell my clients, “You are not your brain. You are the conscious observer (CO) of your brain. You witness and experience vicariously all that your brain is processing.” The separation of the CO from the rest of your brain allows you to be hyper aware of what your brain is wanting. This is one of the best tools for dealing with impulsiveness. Impulsiveness is great if you are running for your life. But 99% of the time, managing impulsiveness is how we develop character and create more balance in our lives. (For a great read on separation of you from your brain, “The Untethered Soul” by Michael Singer). Find your way to a great day!